Scared

I haven't been able to stop thinking about this.

I don't know why it has been weighing so heavily on my mind

But I have been SO SCARED lately of something happening to

myself, my husband or one of my children

It seems like more than ever I am hearing about little

angels being diagnosed with cancer or some kind of life altering illness

One of the parents (Brandon or I) getting in a car accident or being

diagnosed with a terminally ill disease,

I can't imagine leaving my kids without a mother or father

What about those freak incidents that you don't think will happen in your family and someone dies without you being on good terms or saying good-bye?

Even just something "bad" happening...

not necessarily -death- just something unfortunately unexpected?

My heart is so heavy

I mourn for these families who go through these trials,

my heart aches for them

I don't know how I would do it

I don't think I could do it

I know that there is a greater plan for us. I know that there is more after this life. I know that we will see our loved ones again. I am SO thankful for this knowledge. It doesn't mean I won't miss them till I see them again, it doesn't make it "easy".....I know I can turn to my father in heaven and that there are angels looking over us. I know that there are special people here on earth that surround us to help us through hard times, whatever the trial may be.

I look at these people who have gone through these trials with their children, spouse or loved ones, and I see such strength. I admire them for the way they handle their situation. I find myself praying for them and sometimes I don't even know them.

I put myself in their shoes and the tears just start rolling down.

Many times miracles happen and people make it out okay-

and what joy that takes place when that is the outcome.

LATELY I haven't been able to get this off my mind.

LATELY I cannot say enough "I love you's" and "Thank-You's" to the loved ones in my life

I DON'T want to regret any time with my kids or my spouse.

Even if NOTHING happens to them ever, I don't want regrets.

How do I stop worrying about the what-if's?

How do I stop thinking about something happening to my loved ones?

My heart goes out to those who experience pain and trials in all aspects of life.

I know that my savior has been through everything that we have experienced in our lives

He feels our pain, our sorrow, he KNOWS us

He KNOWS what we are going through-

Better than anyone else.